Advice

Bismillah..

There's a growing pattern in our classrooms recently, and it made me wonder how heart can affect actions. Whether it was merely an act, or the genuine thing.

Head is rational

Heart is human

Anger guides the head

Sabar (patience) guides the heart

to take or give advice...

always begin from the heart

and the condition of our heart reflects our words

whether it rose out from truth (calm, clear)

or from our ego (conflicting, messy, angry)

Someone shared this with me:

This person is a rather cool character. A good head on her shoulder, always thinking rationally, with a smile, with a 'knowing' look in her eyes. An educator and a believer in fairness and equality. 

There was a young man, whom people rejects (especially other teachers) and constantly complained about.

Now...she barely knew him, except for the stories that floats around in the office.

One day, she called him for a proper 'talk'.

But before she began...suddenly, all those stories she heard flooded into her brain, took over her rationality and she said something she shouldn't, with a pitch higher than she barely knew she had.

He shot her a look and throw this back as a reply, 

"You're the same like everyone else (I thought you were different)!"

She was taken aback and was immediately filled with a huge regret

She had let those negativity took over her

and it claimed whatever she had believed in (fairness, equality, good rationality, etc)

She realized that it's useless to have a good rationality but a bad intent

because it'd come out all wrong

and hurtful 

Anger guides head because it'll give you 1001 reasons why 'you' are on the right side

Sabar guides heart because it'll give you 1001 reasons how things may appear differently, that things would get better

how we perceive someone will affect what we say

if we judge too early (especially negative suuzon), 

somehow anger would suddenly spat from our mouth

sometimes patience wanes but when this piece of memory crosses my mind

I had to stop

to reflect whether my advice would just be an angry spat or a true word

don't be thinking thyself as benevolent

look inside thy heart, rather on how thy 'appear' to be

people can 'feel' sincerity

it's easier for some

harder for most, actually

but we can try, can't we?

to be kind

to others

to ourselves :)

- - -