October 30, 2015

Calm

Bismillah..

The moonlight
reflects upon the tide
calm is the picture

I wondered
when was the last time I felt this calm?

I was honestly surprised
it was recent
in the busy office
with loads of paperwork and planning to do
huh~

was it because I knew I tried my best each day?
was it because I survived the storm when it comes?

did I just grew up?
In the past, I would seek out the coastline often to vent out
rarely had the time to do so as of late
and yet...instead of how the surrounding defines me, I define my own surrounding
coming into grip with reality
and learn to exist 'with' it

there's a lot of expectations on me
when the letter came to legalized my status
I was quite nonchalant
maybe...because the status doesn't define me
I don't need a stamp to tell me I need to lead or validate that I can order people around

no
recent matters pained me
but it's a blessing despite it's cursed state
it made me reflect of my own intention
of my own words when I'm alone and amongst them
it made me think of Rasulullah SAW
of Sayyidina Omar
I put the first 1 minute of Omar series on repeat
Keep affirm on His path
"so the ignorant can learn, the careless be reminded and the seeker could followsuit"

their words or Allah swt's?

So I kept my silence evwn though I was quite shaken, dissapointed, sad...
I do not put myself in this position but when a muslim is given a reaponsibility, you do not turn yoir back on it
it's my responsibility now

Alhamdulillah~
Thank you Allah swt~
You have shown them what's in my heart without me saying it
The Truth is revealed
Thank You~

I look in the mirror and I'm aware of what is reflected
but Allah swt creates the heart so that its bigger than the physical can own up
calm is in knowing you have Allah swt by your side

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