Bermimpilah

Bismillah..

We just had our Ambition Day...or it's Ambition week to be precise.

I stood there infront of the morning assembly and remembered this.... 

Pernah sekali, ketika Saidina Umar dan sahabat-sahabat sedang duduk di dalam sebuah bilik, Saidina Umar bertanya, "Bermimpilah!".

Salah seorang sahabat berkata, "Aku impikan bilik ini dipenuhi dengan harta yang banyak, jadi aku boleh sedekahkannya ke jalan Allah."

Kemudian Saidina Umar berkata lagi, "Bermimpilah!"

Kemudian, seorang lagi sahabat berkata, "Aku impikan bilik ini dipenuhi dengan emas dan permata, jadi aku boleh sedekahkannya ke jalan Allah."

Saidina Umar berkata lagi, "Bermimpilah!"

Sahabat berkata, "Whaia Amirul Mukminin, kami tak tahu apa yang ingin diimpikan lagi. Engkau mahukan bilik ini dipenuhi dengan apa?"

Saidina Umar menjawab, "Aku impikan rumah ini dipenuhi dengan ‘rijal-rijal’ seperti Muaz b. Jabal, Abu Ubaidah Al-Jarrah, Salim hamba Huzaifah untuk aku gunakan mereka untuk menegakkan kalimah Allah, supaya aku boleh hantar mereka ke jalan Allah”

...so I asked them to dream.

Dream, young one.

while you may hope for all the riches in the world, or the most delicious deserts to enjoy

they disappeared as soon

but to uphold your ambition in being useful to other people, to give benefit, protect and care for others...

if a room is filled with that type of people

wouldn't the world be a better place?

my dream?

I had a different dream when I was younger; architect, writer

I couldn't imagine being in the position I tried to avoid during childhood

to be a teacher

endless marking of paper

while my father did create an environment that made me enjoy learning...I didn't see myself in that profession

during TP, I sat down, completely depressed at the thought of being stuck as a teacher for thirty to forty years

though, this afternoon, when I saw a physically impaired young man stood there

accounting his life born of no arms, nurtured by people who never stop believing him, and now, he stood there as one of them (a teacher)

heart stuck in my throat

I wanted to say to him....

"young man, if I've been your teacher, I'd have said this. I'm proud. I'm very proud of you."

...and I remembered why I'm here. as if it has only been yesterday...the young boy who said that proud 'ada!'

My life altered just as I hoped his would too.

I want to be able to see you grow up and say those words. "I'm proud of you."

dream, young one. Dream high.

- - -

Fitrah

Bismillah...

Little drops gathered

form small streams run

along its woodland path

past fallen branches

roots protruding from the ground

run and gather they did

trickling fast until they stilled

to the main river they're meant to find

till they meet others still

in their path to their ending one

'Tis life far from over

one story gathers to another one

woven and woven together

what used to be different now becomes one

Once upon a time, I feared looking into the future

first motherhood is that

full of hope and fear

tethering to the edge, pleading for any kind of hold

and really..all that matters is He who Creates us

A very white one she is

everytime someone says that, makes me want to hold her cheeks to mine

yes, indeed

once, she was very

eyes never leaving her till her cheeks become flushed and her first cries be heard

waiting for the flailing kicking that she had done inside

that waiting, just holding on to Allah swt, hoping..praying..

...and for the first week,

just looking..makes the hold tighter, 

whispering soft prayers to her ears

for nine months, for a breath of life

now, for a life dedicated to One who makes her alive

my child, there is only One who could love you more than I do

while I can say I will stay with you forever

love and cherish you

wanting to give the world to you

it's not possible

for the only One who could know your heart

truly protect and cherish them

till goodness comes out from your words

from your actions as you grow up

there can only be One

the best I can do , give as a mother

more than love and affection

is to give you 'ilm

knowledge of this Deen

so you can recognize your Creator

for the saddest thing, really

is to not know

Hadis riwayat Abu Hurairah Radhiyallahu’anhu, ia berkata: Rasulullah Shallallahu alaihi wassalam bersabda: 

“Setiap anak itu dilahirkan dalam keadaan fitrah. Kedua orang tuanyalah yang membuatnya menjadi seorang Yahudi, seorang Nasrani maupun seorang musyrik.” 

Lalu seorang laki-laki bertanya: 

“Ya Rasulullah! Bagaimana pendapat engkau kalau anak itu mati sebelum itu?” 

Beliau menjawab: “Allah lebih tahu tentang apa yang pernah mereka kerjakan.”

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