First intuition

Bismillah...

it's morning of second day of raya

would like to wish everyone to have a good time

to celebrate together, a moment of victor

and the blend of young and old

Personally, my first day of raya

went with a certain blur and attachment

as if I have a remote control, that can press mute or talk

zoom in or zoom out

-abstract-

nuff' said

found out a lot of things. love kids, teenagers. Somehow... I (still) lack the ability to communicate properly with those of my own age...or it just means I have to get out more. ;) 

Wallahualam~

The big reveal: found out the reason of someone's escapism. Figure out it'd be told eventually...thought I had to grilled it out, didn't expect it to be served in a silver platter (easily confided) because it's a horrible secret, you know.

I figured, if anyone killed anybody, they'd probably have told me first. *shivers*

That's the thing, I used to be frustrated how I could 'understand' people all too well. Their good and bad side. Understand is okay, but to accept it?? I mean, some of them are taboo subjects. Pretty extreme for a teenager.
 I've heard of two suicidal reports, an escapism, weird identity crises, always the middle person (the sympathetic listener) of any love affairs going on back in the hostel days.

Turns out it's Allah swt gift for them, so they'd have a person who could listen without harsh judgement. Maybe to make up how the opposite is done to me. A person who lack expression to communicate well of her intention.

Either way, had a talk with her (the escapee). It's a burden to hold her own. She did something wrong but I could fully well understand her decision. It's a mess...but rather than looking at the crime seen, listen to the victim first. This is owed to her.

Injustice had been thrown at us, personally, forced my ownself into mutism during my early youth. If you keep thinking about it, it's unfair. It's unfair.

Yet, thinking back...it's what shape who I am, sharpen the gift of intuition that could help others come into terms with themselves. The good, the bad...

I still fear him. Right now...it's hard for me to trust my own protector. Couldn't be in the same room, without hearing those words echoes in my head and squeeze my weeping heart for it. His words are what cut me the deepest. Though I could understand (no matter how horrible it was, as it was done to me)...maybe one day, I hope, soon..

that I can forgive him.

because my intuition says so. 
Amin~ :")

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